I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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