actually, I'm a sock model
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
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