If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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