Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
You were trust falling into bushes
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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