Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
