ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
