Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
