Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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