Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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