You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
