Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
