i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
