Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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