are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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