Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize