Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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