Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
