Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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