I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize