i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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