I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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