Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Randomize
