Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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