that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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