This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
