Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
