Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
