glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize