I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
