Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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