How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize