It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Watching her eat just hurts me
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
