On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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