I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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