For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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