Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
