return my video game
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize