but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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