Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
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he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
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Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
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