he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
