I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize
