so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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