break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
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