If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
So squirting runs in the family.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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