margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
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