u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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