just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I can't trust your balls anymore.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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