i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
