i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
