Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize