Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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